One of the first things a mediator in training is taught is to listen, really listen what the parties are saying. Aka “Active Listening”! Well, it seems that the need and ability to listen is a trait that many in the general population should also learn. A recent article in [Read More]
I just finished reading Becoming by Michelle Obama (Crown Publishing 2018). While the book is an autobiography of the former First Lady, its theme is more than just a story about how some African American kid from the Southside of Chicago broke multiple barriers to become a world known public [Read More]
The other weekend, my husband and I were visiting some friends (husband and wife) whom we had not seen in a while. As we were leaving, the wife and I were avidly talking with each other, seemingly interrupting each other, or at least, not letting the other finish a sentence. [Read More]
Have you ever sat back with your eyes closed and listened to music or someone speaking? Why did you do it? Probably, to appreciate more fully and deeply what you were hearing. By shutting down one of our senses, we allow ourselves to hone in more deeply to the music [Read More]
As part of a book club, I just finished reading Difficult Conversations [How To Discuss What Matters Most] by Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton and Sheila Heen (Second edition, Penguin Books, New York, 2010). While its advice is geared towards the layman, as an experienced neutral, I found some interesting nuggets [Read More]
Several years ago, I took a course with Douglas Noll who noted that everyone in a conflict is a victim, and every person in that conflict has six needs that must be met before the conflict can be resolved: vengeance, vindication, validation, need to be heard, need to create meaning [Read More]
In last week’s blog, I mentioned one paradox (competition and cooperation) discussed by Bernard Mayer in his book, The Conflict Paradox (ABA and Jossey-Bass, 2015). A second one is avoidance and engagement. Like the first paradox, on superficial glance, avoidance and engagement appear to be polar opposites. But, upon deeper [Read More]
Snap Judgments. We all make them … and how they can lead us astray! This obvious point is made in a blog posted on March 2, 2015 on the Harvard Program on Negotiation’s blog website ( entitled "How Snap Judgments Can Lead Negotiators Astray In Negotiation Conversations" ). The unidentified authors [Read More]
